Oz (2024)

Review: Oz (2024)

By William Pattison

 

This time I got you a twisted Italian horror version of The Wizard of Oz and, oh boy, I get to be the first person to review it…yes, I know you’re welcome…

Dorothy, battling self-image, is lured by a sinister clown into a surreal theater world. With the Scarecrow, Tin Woman, and Lion Man, she uncovers a deceptive Wizard-actually a manipulative doctor. As a dark ritual looms, the group must choose between obedience or saving Dorothy, confronting emotional wounds and breaking the Wizard's cycle of pain across Oz and reality.

Ugh, this film is a low budget crap version of the classic story. Shit, the Scarecrow, Tin Woman (yes I said Tim Woman), and The Lion look like failed welfair cosplayers who had to grab things from around the house to make costumes. As for Dorothy, she is a goth girl with the year 1939 in red letter on her back shirt. For those not in the know 1939 was the year The Wizard of Oz was released. Also the wizard is a tacky circus clown. I was not impressed with the lot. The acting was horrid and the dubbing did not even help this literal nightmare (and not in the right way).(Spoiler) Yes, it turns out Dorothy and crew are patients in a nut house with a psychiatrist that has a liking for black magic. Oh, boy…

The production quality makes the worst z grade crapfest look good. This film was so bad my sister demanded I turn it off on her big screen TV. I had to finish watching it on my phone, which also didn’t  improve it.

To put it simply this film is dog shit.

If you want to suffer you can find it on Tubi TV. I strongly suggest for your sanity to avoid like the plague. Ok, now I will resume hitting my head on the wall.

 

Review: Into the Abyss (2022)

Review: Into the Abyss (2022)

By William Pattison

 

His time I have a dark lovecraftian-like post apocalyptic film from Argentina…

They came from the sky, bringing with them an eternal night. Then there came the flood that would change humanity forever. Bannon is trapped in the middle of an isolated city, which is perpetually covered by a black and rainy sky, and which epitomizes the end and decay of the old world. Seeking to leave this condemned area, he will realize that his very existence drags the vestiges of that world and they must be put to the test or perish in the abyss.

 Thought this was an excellent psychical/survival film, though I hated the ending because you weren’t sure what is going on.

A lot of people complained about how slow and drawn out this film was, but I was really understanding because most foreign films have that feel to them. People in Europe have more patience than American audiences. I was happy that I found a copy with an American dub on it because it would have been draining to try to keep put with subtitles.

I really liked Bannon and Dave. I thought the actors and the voice actors did an excellent job.

I found the story interesting, except for the last 20 minutes and loved the atmosphere whole they were in the city. Outside the city was a bit too bright. It was a harsh transition.

I really enjoyed the creature FX, as limited as they were. The soldier aliens were some good makeup FX and were lit well enough to make the creepy and disturbing. The huge leviathan aliens had a real Lovecraftian feel to them. I actually wished we’d gotten to see more of them, but I gather the lack was due to budget.

All in all I was very pleased, but I can honestly say this film is not for most Americans horror/SciFi movie goers. I’m  more cultured than your average movie goers and I doubt this film could keep an average viewers interest long enough to finish them film especially if they had to watch the Argentinian language version. Also, the ending will put them off. So, with that said I cannot recommend this film unless you speak Argentinian and like odd endings.

 

Facebook is really crossing the line by limiting posting, sharing, and commenting on their social media site.

That's right people on Facebook if you do a post and try to share it you get a notice now the Facebook is now limiting posting, sharing, and commenting. They also make it clear that if you are found guilty of over posting, I guess one post or comment or per two hours, multiple times Facebook will block you from communicating period for over a month or the will delete your account.

This is outrageous. Zuckerberg is going way too far with this bullshit and people on Facebook need to stand up against this crap or we need to walk away and create a new social media community that doesn't have such restrictions on communication. This latest shit is way out of line.

All I was posting the same movie reviews I've been posting here. It shouldn't be an issue. Give me a break...

Review: Never Blink (2025)

Review: Never Blink (2025)

By William Pattison

 

Some old friends of mine made their first feature film that isn’t a paranormal documentary…

A team of medical students capture images of the world we don't see when we blink, and the results are beyond terrifying. A frightening journey into a macabre world that will make you never want to blink again. The mind functions in up to 11 dimensions. When we blink, a part of the mind reboots into those other dimensions. We lose an average of 48 minutes per day to that darkness. What if we could see what we are missing? What if those pathways lead to doors that should never be opened. Welcome to Never Blink, a whole new dimension of terror.

I’ve been acquaited with Christian Saint Booth and his brother Philip Adrian Booth, aka The Booth Brothers, since the release of their first paranormal documentary Spooked: The Ghosts of Waverly Hills and on through Children of The Grave1 and 2, and The Exorcist Diaries.

 I met Christian and his lovely wife when I had a table at EPIC Con. Wonderful people.

 The Booth Brothers have been the best in the field of paranormal documentaries and have been the bar that other paranormal documentarians are judged by.

Christian actually had produced a few horror films, including the excellent Dead Still. Now The Booth Brothers have joined  again and have taken the incredibly brave step of changing genres and leaving paranormal documentaries for horror with Never Blink. I’ve  only seen this happen twice in my time watching horror films. First was the astounding Gregory Dark with his directorial See No Evil. Then with Edward Douglas and Gavin Goszka and there first feature film The Dead Matter.

This film has been getting a lot of bad criticism on IMDB. I don’t  agree with most of it but there are a few things the other reviewers got right. One thing is all the nurses and female medical researchers look like horror girls from horror conventions rather than what they are supposed to be. One researcher is a full on punk rocker. The Asian researcher actually changed from a half head shaved WOKE activist to a girl about to go to the club at times and then in the next scene wearing next to no makeup.

Also a couple royally annoying things in this film is the English accented notification and computer voice. This thing royally took me out of the story because it actually sounded like a girl doing a bad ALEXA imitation. Also they call the other dimension in the story The Inbetween and the main evil in it looks like Vecna from Stranger Things. Give me a break.

The story had potential but it never fulfilled it. I found the concept interesting but the way it was presented was just plain off to me.

Unfortunately I really can’t recommend this film. I can’t  stop you if you want to take a crack at it though. You can find it on Tubi TV. But if you want to see The Booth Brothers at their best check out Spooked: The Ghosts of Waverly Hills or The Haunted Boy: The Secret Diary of The Exorcist…Also on Tubi…

 

Review: The Demonologist (2019)

Review: The Demonologist (2019)

By William Pattison

 

This time I got a low budget demon hunter film…

Detective Damien Seryph investigates a string of murders that connects to a group trying to bring forth the 4 King Demons of Hell. Damien's past connects him to those involved and will force him to become "The Demonologist".

This film is one of those films that come out through Uncorked Distribution, which is usually an indication that it is complete crap. But once in a long while this crap distributor comes out with something that is at least watchable. This film is one of those even though the reviews on IMDB say otherwise.

Brian Krause does an ok job as the detective who is destined to be The Demonologist. The rest of the cast are acceptable, but I doubt you’ll find any future Academy or Golden Globe winners among them.

The story is the typical detective dealing with demons, it isn’t as bad as IMDB would lead you to believe. Also the FX and makeup work is a bit better than the usual Uncorked fare.

 So, this film is in no way art. It is barely even entertaining. To put it simply I won’t recommend it because I want to lead you to good entertaining films. Acceptable is not always acceptable…

Review: What Lives Here (2024)

Review : What Lives Here (2024)

By William Pattison

 

What do you get when you put foul mouthed junk removers into a creepy mansion? You get this film…

A Junk removal company is lured to an out-of-state project by a real estate agent promising big buck to remove the contents of a mansion with a sinister past.

 I royally loved this film. It is clearly a modern film but it has that 80s slasher vibe. You know. That little bit of glorious evil fairy dust that made us love 80s horror so much.

I loved the characters, even though they had potty mouths at times, which was the major complaint on IMDB. Give me a break!

The location is awesome. The house is amazing and creepy at the same time. You can see that they filmed the interiors in an actual house, which not an easy thing.

The story is good. The kills are satisfying. It even has some humor that catches you by surprise. This film is just plain good stuff and I say it’s  AWESOMETACULAR!!!

You want to check this film out you can find it on Tubi TV. I highly, highly recommend it…

 

Review: Brute 1976 (2025)

Review: Brute 1976 (2025)

By William Pattison

 

This time we got a supposed love letter to films like The Texas Chainsaw Massacre…

In 1976 a group of people in the desert for a photo shoot stumble upon an abandoned town called Savage. But they are not alone. A family of masked psychopaths have claimed Savage as their own and are hell bent on living up to its name.

This film is an amusing, semi comedic, homage to the 70s beginning of slasher films.

This film is clearly meant as a love letter to the 70s and such films as The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and The Hills Have Eyes. Unfortunately, the filmmakers messed themselves up by making the character have a very 2000s knowledge of slasher films and throw in some non-70s views on homosexuality. Seriously, no one in the 70s is going to casually use the term slasher or talk about final girls. All these flubs kind of takes you out of the 70s and blatantly reminds you that this is a modern film with a 70s veneer on it, which ruins it. Well, it did for me.

I honestly think that with the slightest bit of editing this film could be a really outstanding homage, but in it’s present state it’s  a no go.

Some fans might enjoy this film, but I’m  not giving it my recommendation for the reasons I gave above.

If you want to check it out it is on Tubi TV.

 

 

 

 

Review: Predator Badlands (2025)

Predator: Badlands (2025)

By William Pattison

 

This time I got the latest film in the Predator Franchise.

A young Predator outcast from his clan finds an unlikely ally on his journey in search of the ultimate adversary.

I have to admit I had limited expectations with this film. I knew Disney would make this film a lot less brutal than the other films in the series and make it a typical coming of age adventure with a Predator as the main character. I wasn’t disappointed. It was exactly that. But it was a smidge better than that, and I mean a smidge. We start out with our main character who is a young Predator who has failed his training and is set to be beheaded by his father when his brother intervenes and is killed in his stead the brother, before dying throws his younger brother into a ship and sends him to a killer planet to prove himself by killing and bring back the ultimate killer species on this planet.

One good this this filmmaker does is create a nasty environment for this film. Pretty much everything on this planet is out to kill you, even the very grass is like razor blades.

Also the filmmaker managed to put in lots of blood, but it is all white, green, blue, and black, no red blood allowed because there is not one human in sight…

I thought the actor playing the young Predator did an acceptable job. He was not the Predator we’ve come to know in the earlier movies, the ultimate hunter. This guy has a lot of faults and needs the help of a simulant from the company from the Alien Franchise.

The simulant , who is played by Ell Fanning plays the part of information source, and comedy, happy, sidekick. Also, Fanning plays her “sister” simulant who is essentially the film’s villain.

All in all I was entertained by this film but this film doesn’t feel like a Predator film. It feels like a film full of buddy action, lots of cool visuals, and plenty of fighting, but the things that make a good Predator film is missing, so with that said I cannot in good conscience recommend it. I enjoyed what I saw but what I saw wasn’t even close to what it was supposed to be and what is really annoying is this film was done by the director of Prey, which was a really well done Predator film.

Review: Site 13 (2023)

Review: Site 13 (2023)

By William Pattison

 

This time I got another Lovecraftian horror film…

SITE 13 is a Cosmic Horror film. When Dr. Nathan Marsh awakens from a catatonic state in a mental institution, he must relive his last expedition by watching tapes from the site visit, only to discover he's unleashed an unstoppable horror.

His film amazingly managed to capture the creepy feeling of Lovecraft’s writings on a shoestring budget, which seems to be the best way to do movies either based or inspired by Lovecraft. I loved the long exposition scenes, which are the hallmarks of good Lovecraftian films. I also enjoyed the cheap CGI Old One, which added that low budget charm to this piece.

In conclusion I have to say that though this film is far from AWESOMETACULAR it is a good film that you don’t  need alcohol or drugs to enjoy, so be happy with that. You can see this film on Tubi TV…

 

Fun and Games (2023)

Review: All Fun and Games (2023)

By William Pattiso

 

This time I got a film about I knife that conjures a demon…

A group of Salem teens discover a cursed knife that unleashes a demon that forces them to play gruesome, deadly versions of childhood games where there can be no winners, only survivors.

This is a well done medium length horror film, about one hour and sixteen minutes long. I the dysfunctional family that gets stuck playing the games. None of them are actually innocent, even the thirteen year old. I love that the “demon” in the games is actually a ghost of a young boy with was wrongly accused of witchcraft during Pilgrim times. I thought the mythology established was well represented. The story totally kept my interest and was edited well so there was no lag in the film, like there is in a lot of modern horror films.

I highly recommend this film, it’s  AWESOMETACULAR!!!

 

Review: The Black-Eyed Children (2025)

Review: The Black-Eyed Children (2025)

By William Pattison

 

This time I got a found footage film featuring the infamous Black-Eyed Children…

A young woman takes a job at an autumn camp in the woods, only to arrive to find that all the children have mysteriously disappeared. But as night falls, much to her dismay, some of them return.

This was a really creepy shoestring budget found footage film. I loved the location they chose for this film, it was very atmospheric. Besides that it is pretty much a small cast film with the most work being done by the female lead. In a lot of the other reviews on this film people made a big deal about the lady’s accent. I had no issues with it. I could understand her perfectly. As for the rest of the cast, decided Bill Oberst Jr who did an amazing job given he did it all via a webcam. Bill does a long and elliquent monologue halfway through the film. Good stuff Bill!

 As for the title characters, due to the budget they could only affort three black eyed children (all girls) when the story said there were seventeen missing kids. Still those kids were creepy as shit. I wish they had done the paranormal version of black eyed kids rather than the UFO version. It would have worked far better with the incredibly creepy location.

All in all it was very entertaining. I’ll recommend it if you are really into found footage.

 

Review: The Quantum Devil (2023)

Review: The Quantum Devil (2023)

By William Pattison

 

Ok, this time we got yet another attempt to do an original film using the Lovecraft mythos…

The Quantum Devil is a fitting title for what we get to watch here, as four exceptional graduates of quantum science are invited by a controversial host, to earn a record pay of $ 500000,- each, for helping him successfully finish an experiment to travel into another dimension. Arrival at the mansion of their host already makes them realize something is odd, may be afoot. Then, their host is called away, leaving the four guests legitimated to start the experiment without him. The call being a ruse, as the host, Cervovich Senior, actually decides to use a different machine, allowing him to supervise the four candidates without them being aware of it. The team successfully creates a quantum drift, but weird coincidences make that seem a flawed success, as some sense of menace remains persistently. Finally, the team realizes that they are in trouble, as one by one they get murdered, until only one candidate still is left alive. Deluded, that he can ignore the diabolical aka homicidal antagonists and just flee back to 'reality', he is blocked from that option by the host proving to have quite some power to alter that quantum pocket dimension they are stuck in. In a final showdown, the host wins by cheating, returning to the real world to supervise similar experiments that did not go that well. The former four candidates are left behind, as if ghosts (trapped in that quantum dimension).

This is an interesting but horribly flawed film. To be precise, this is a mess. The supposed failed scientists don’t  act like scientists. They are clearly actors struggling to say all the technical jargon. Also none of these people even look like scientists. All the women dress like whores. The guys look more like cheap college students. Then there is the boss who is wearing a red robe and has the retarded man servant. I really wasn’t  impressed. The filmmaker tries to connect this garbage into the Lovecraft mythos, which he thinks will turn this turd to gold, and royally fails. The FX is cheap and the story is complete and utter crap. Excuse me, Robert Englund as Cythulu? I don’t  think so. You want a good similar film? Check out Frankenstein Syndrome, that is an excellent film. This is DOGSHIT!!!

Review: Hellbenders 3D (2012)

Hellbenders 3D (2012)

By William Pattison

 

The Augustine Interfaith Order of Hellbound Saints, a team of blasphemous ministers who live in a constant state of debauchery, work to drag the worst of demons back to Hell.

As a real fan of anti-heroes, especially the paranormal type, given that I’m the author of the Devlin Darck Demon Fíghter tales, I was really loving this film. Sinning priests who are sent to possessions to go nuclear and drag demons to Hell is a brilliant concept. It reminds me of the Clive Barker story Saint Sinner. Love this stuff! It gets so tongue in cheek which is so much fun, as long as you don’t  have a royal stick up your backside when it comes to religion. Catholics and Mormon, when it comes down to it can be enormous sources of humor. It is why Book of Mormon is such a stellar hit on Broadway. This is a nasty, gory, and irreverent film in the extreme and I have to say it is AWESOMETACULAR!!!

Ou can find this film on Tubi TV.

Review: Necromentia (2009)

Review: Necromentia (2009)

By William Pattison

 

What do you get when you desire Hellraiser and it’s not available and neither is Event Horizon?  When much like the person who wants nachos but ends up with pancakes and guac. Here is the movie you’ve been waiting for…

An off-world look at the superstitious repercussions of tattooing a Ouija Board on your body. Hagen, who has a dead wife, believes that he can revive her from the dead. Travis, a man who lost his brother and wants to join him in the afterlife. Morbius, a bartender who is betrayed by those he loves comes back from the dead to take revenge. And a strange man, known only as Mr. Skinny, protects the secrets of the Ouija Board and how the stories weave and affect each other.

Amusingly enough this film is far better than any of the latter Hellraiser sequels, meaning after Hellraiser: Hellseeker. This film actually has the feel of one of the issues of the original Hellraiser comic book. It is a story about Hell without the Hellpriest nor any of the original. I loved the design of the demons, especially Mr Skinney and the chained to demon. All the characters are well done for this kind of story, none are innocent and all are sadomasochistic manipulators. The atmosphere is shadowy, industrial, and very dystopian. The story expertly meshes all three of the storylines together. All in all if you are a Hellraiser fan you will love this film. I was royally pleased. In fact I enjoyed this film far more than the last three Hellraiser films. Enjoy the pain and blood…

You can find this film on both Tubi TV and Fawesome…

L

Review: Project MKHEXE (2025)

Review: Project MKHEXE (2025)

By William Pattison

 

This time I have a mockumentary horror film…

Tim, an amateur filmmaker, returns home to film his brother Sean's funeral after his apparent suicide. But in the days that follow, Tim discovers Sean's obsession with an Internet urban legend that does not exist about a secret government mind control experiment gone horrifically wrong, Project MKHEXE.

I’m not a huge government conspiracy fan but this mockumentary has a very Lovecraftian aspect.

I found that I admired how much love and care the filmmaker used in creating the lore around the MKHEXE project. The film is literal art piece when it came to the detail of the brother’s research into this supposed Internet urban legend that doesn’t  exist and those who seek it end up having horrifying and tragic ends. I loved how in the film MKHEXE affects the people around those who seek it. The film is well shot and acted. There are no under or overdone performances which makes this film that much more disturbing and helps draw you into the huge complicated puzzle. Don’t  expect any real scares or a monster at the end. This is not that type of found footage. You get the truth about MKHEXE, but like the works of Lovcraft the creators know they can’t really do the other world terror justice so you get a lot of strobing and random images, which works well. The truth is the thing you don’t see is more disturbing than anything a filmmaker can produce. If you are into found footage films you just might enjoy this film. This is definitely not for the uninitiated. But if you love government conspiracy and Lovecraftian terror this is your film and I will happily recommend it.

You can find this film on Tubi TV and Fawesome…

 

Review: Hell House LLC (2025)

Review: Hell House LLC: Lineage (2025)

By William Pattison

 

This time I’m reviewing the lastest installment of the Hell House LLC franchise.

Haunted by visions and recurring nightmares years after a near-death experience, Vanessa Shepherd finds herself living in the town of Abaddon, unable to break free from its unexplainable hold on her. When people around her suddenly and inexplicably begin to die, she soon uncovers her terrifying connection to the Abaddon Hotel, the Carmichael Manor and the mysterious murders that have been occurring for decades.

I have to say that though I’ve seen all the films in this series I can’t really call myself a fan. I was entertained by the majority of them, but they really weren’t anything I went out of my way to see. I do have to acknowledge that this series is one of two found footage series that have evolved into a full franchise. The other being Paranormal Activity. Yet, I have to say I was especially unimpressed by this installment. In an odd change from it’s other installments this film is not found footage. On top of that this film is not even a full story. It was promoted as the finale of the series yet it ended on a cliff hanger and a lead up to an actual final installment. As well, this film feels like only half a story. To make it worse this film lacks the scares and writing of its sister films. In fact it feels more like an information dump than a full installment. Sadly, I cannot recommend this film, but unfortunately if you plan to see the final installment whenever it comes out you are going to have to slog through this film to keep up with the details of the puzzle. I feel sorry for you…

Review: Queens of the Dead (2025)

Review: Queens of the Dead (2025)

By William Pattison

 

Drag queens and other members of the LGBQ battle zombies craving brains during a zombie outbreak at their drag show in Brooklyn, putting personal conflicts aside to utilize their distinct abilities against the undead threat.

There have been a lot of variations of zombie films over the years including punks rockers, prostitutes, and strippers. Now, finally, we get a zombie film featuring drag queens. Perfect team up for a horror comedy. I loved the characters in this film, but I thought the story was ok.

There was definitely not enough drag queens. I saw only three and one was a zombie.

 Also I hated the zombie makeup because for some reason the filmmakers decided to paint all the zombies with silver paint, that was it just silver paint.

 I did like that they injected incidental music that reminded me of Day of the Dead. They also had a cameo of Tom Savini.

But in the end I have to say that this film fails to be a good zombie film. Shoot, the zombies were hardly in it, but thank goodness because silver skinned zombies just don’t work.

So, I cannot recommend this film because I really wanted a funny drag queen and zombie film, but this isn’t it. Sorry…

 

Review: Videotheque aka Videoteka (2024)

Review: Videotheque aka Videoteka (2024)

By William Pattison

 

This time I’ve got a Serbian anthology film…

Fleeing the police, a small-time thief hides in an abandoned video store. Stuck for the night he decides to play three strange films.

I have to say that I really enjoyed the wrap around story, which is about a thief who ends up stuck in this royally creepy abandoned video store. The video store actually reminded me of a real cringe video store I used to frequent in the 80s, though a bit dusty and dirtier.

(Warning: Spoiler Alert)

The three stories are really well done, though I have to say the first story Dangar is a bit anticlimactic to me. It tells the story of a tribal man who is saved from drowning in the ice by an old man. The old man has a blind daughter. The tribal man ends up killing the old man and burning the daughter as a sacrifice to his gods. You don’t  really get any reasons for this. The second story is a very Twilight Zone style story about a young man who works at a sandwich shop and has a beautiful girlfriend. One day he meets a man who drives a BMW. The guy introduces him to his boss who is a rich man. The old man somewhat jokingly offers to switch with the young man because the young man wants to have the good life. So, the young man ends up waking up in the old man’s body.

The third story is about a cop who has a slight obsession with an underaged girl and is married to a pregnant wife. The cop is in the middle of a situation where a suspected serial killer has escaped jail and is on the loose The girl is related to the murdered guard and the viewer is lead to expect that the suspect isn’t  the killer but the cop.

All the stories are well produced and shot. The only unfortunately thing is these stories are all in Serbian with subtitles, so I ended up getting a headache having to try reading the dialogue while watching. Also, this film is a lot like our VHS anthology series, but with better written stories and a lot less gore. I will definitely recommend this film, if you can find it since it is a Serbian film. I will only suggest you keep some aspirins on hand for the headache from the subtitles you will get.

 

Review: Extremity (2018)

Review: Extremity (2018)

By William Pattison

This time I got a film about an extremely haunt…

Allison, a young woman with a severely troubled past who signs up for an extreme haunt called Perdition. She believes that putting herself through Perdition's nightmarish trials will help her exorcise her internal traumas, but has no way of knowing just how shocking her ordeal will be-or what dark secrets buried in her psyche will emerge.

I had expected to really enjoy this film, after all I’ve seen films like The Houses October Built and a couple of other films about extreme haunts.

Unfortunately, this film royally disappointed me. It amusingly lacked the extreme haunted house feel of the other films and it seemed the creator mistakened extreme extreme haunts for S&M and torture which is not the same. Also, they ruined the members of the supposed haunt and exposed who they are, including the head man of the haunt. Not only does he pull off his mask, we end up finding out he is a family man and his haunt is failing. I royally hated this. The other haunt films left the cast members of the haunts unknown and left them scary. This film made the cast a bunch of losers and the head man the biggest loser. No, no, no, fail. Then they do the ridiculous thing of having Mr Loser haunt guy somehow find the main character’s abusive and molesting father and have him confront her. After that bullshit, which came after all the earlier stuff. I just shook my head. Give me a break. This film. Was a complete mess. It started out ok and then after the first act it tanked and kept tanking. I would have happily accepted the ending of it wasn’t  for way they handled two thirds of this film.

This is definitely a non- recommendation. If you want a good extreme haunt film check out The Houses that October Built, it is the best of this subgenre.

Review: Mr. Jones (2013)

Review: Mr. Jones (2013)

By William Pattison

 

Scott and Penny move to the woods to do a nature documentary. They discover that the guy who lives in the next cabin is the infamous artist known only as Mr. Jones, who is known for sending out scarecrow-like figures to select people with traumatic results. They to change their plans and do their documentary on Mr. Jones instead. But they find that they’ve gotten into something they should have left alone and soon they find their nightmares and reality begin to collide when they enter the world of Mr. Jones.

This film is a freaky, disturbing, mind fuck. It is amazing what these filmmakers achieve with sticks, animal bones, and candles. The atmosphere of this film is unique. It is definitely in the mockumentary subgenre but it also expands well into psychology horror as well. It overwhelms the viewer with the otherness like Lovecraft, but in its own unique way. Don’t  expect jump scares with this film. This film, when it gets started, makes you feel continuously off kilter. It literally gave me the chills, and with my experience in horror it don’t get that.

Honestly, I have to say this is the best film of its kind that I’ve seen. It you want to feel some real creeps this is the film for you. For me, and I’m  not a huge fan of found footage/ mockumentary films, I say this film is AWESOMETACULAR!!!

 

Review: Its Name Was Mormo (2024)

Review: Its Name Was Mormo (2024)

By William Pattison

This time I got a found footage demon film that isn’t a Paranormal Activity film…

A young family's life unravels into chaos as a sinister presence targets each member in its own malicious manner. Through the lens of police evidence, Mark, Diana, and Mia endure the torment of a demon deeply rooted in Greek mythology.

I was not impressed with this film. It was a typical Paranormal Activity like found footage film. The wrap around of the computer screen and the guy who is reporting the case is ineffective and in fact ruin the ending of the film. I do have to give the filmmaker kudos for getting the performance he did out of the little girl.

But all in all this is not a good found footage film that brings nothing to this subgenre. I cannot recommend it. Just watch one of the Paranormal Activity films. You’ll  have a far more entertaining time. Also if you are going to title a film, Its Name Was Mormo, you better the fuck mention the damned name in the film. No excuse…

 

Review: Kristy (2014)

Review: Kristy (2014)

By  William Pattison

This time I’m reviewing a film suggested by Ghost Pirate, aka Kainan Becker…

College girl Justine works hard to support herself at Bryce College, where she studies. During Thanksgiving, her boyfriend Aaron goes home and Justine has plans to stay on campus with her roommate, Nicole. Out of the blue, Nicole's father invites her to Aspen, while Justine remains in the dorm. One night, Justine drives to a convenience store to buy supplies and meets Violet, who threatens her. Shaken, Justine returns to campus, where she soon finds herself being hunted down by Violet and three hoodlums from a cult. Justine has to fight to survive.

Now I have to confess that though this film was suggested by Kainan Becker, he saw it because it was a suggestion mentioned on Rebecca McKendry’s podcast. I have to admit that this piece of information gave me pause when it came to viewing this film, given my history with McKendry and the fact that she helped kill Fangoria (Yes, I  know it is back, but the new owners brought back all the people who killed it in the first place with their social politics bullshit…). I also heard she along with Christopher Alexander and Bob Martin got my bio and credit for my Camp Crystal Lake Novels pulled as well as had me banned from Wikipedia. So, to put it simply there is zero love lost. But on with the review because I decided fuck the bitch and her opinion…I’ll give my honest opinion.

Ok, I’ve  seen a lot of films like this that are varied in how good they are. The Strangers and You’re Next come to mind. This film is really middle of the road to me. I was entertained, but this film in no way expands upon this subgenre in any way. I have to say that Haley Bennett did an excellent job as Justine but of course she did because she was literally the center of the film. The killers were literally just there to take up space. I wasn’t impressed at all with the lot, especially creepy girl with the lip piecing. Shit, the film was mainly Justine running from the three killers and having the music make you jump. When it is the music that brings the scares you are in trouble. I honestly got annoyed with that whistling shit too. My associate, Mr Highland, uses that routine when he dresses like a clown and pranks people. It’s real amateur time.

So, even though Kainan and McKendry thought this film was the shit I was not impressed other than the actress and the last ten minutes of the film when she started being tactical and started killing the fucks that were hunting her.  Sorry, no recommendation here unless you are a social justice warrior and think Rebecca is bitchin’…

The Whisper in Darkness

Review: The Whisperer in Darkness (2011)

By William Pattison

 

Based on the H. P. Lovecraft story of the same name, a folklorist investigates reports of unusual creatures in Vermont only to uncover more than he bargained for.

I’m a HUGE retro horror film fan. I loved House of  the Wolfman and Frankenstein and the Creature of Black Lake as well as The Lost Skeleton of Cadavera. This is actually my second retro style HP Lovecraft film. The other was the retro silent film, The Call of Cythulu. I have to say that black and white is the perfect format to use for a Lovecraft story. This film captures that 50s style sci fi/horror vibe. Even with the obvious CGI creatures this film still retains that retro 50s feel. The casting is perfection and the acting is just right. This film is a brilliant homage to those old classics my generation watched shows like Creature Features on Saturday nights. So, with all this said I  have to say The Whisper in Darkness is AWESOMETACULAR!!!

You can find this film on Tubi TV…

 

HP Lovecraft's Necronomicon: Book of the Dead (2023)

Review: HP Lovecraft’s Necronomicon: Book of the Dead (2023)

By William Pattison

 

Supposedly from the mind of HP Lovecraft comes the story of  George Carney, who is hired by a graphic novel publishing company to validate a book that is supposedly the black magic diary of Aleister Crowley. The book is supposedly the inspiration for the book in Lovecraft’s stories,The Necronomicon, a book made from human flesh that can bring the dead back to life. Carney is sent to New Orleans and New York and meet up with people who can prove the book is real, but he is unaware his publisher has secondary reason for sending Carney on his quest, one that will cost the comic book writer his soul.

This is a very dark movie, literally. The filmmaker tried to give the film a shadowy art noir atmosphere, but instead made it hard to watch. This fucker is dark and not in the good way, as in not lighting. The opening and ending, with the narrator in the car, royally doesn’t  help the film and makes it look horribly amateurish. Even the inclusion of Michael Madson, Lyssette Anthony, and Sylvester McCoy does nothing to improve this mess of a film. The filmmaker needs to realize that just because you reference Lovecraft or the Necronomicon doesn’t  make it a Lovecraft film.

As a fan of Lovecraft’s work I’m  royally offended by this film. Ignore this piece of crap and instead watch the Lovecraft anthology film Necronomicon: Book of the Dead, which starred Bruce Campbell as HP Lovecraft. It is a legimate Lovecraft film and is far more entertaining…

 

 

 

Review: Frankenstein (2025)

Review: Frankenstein (2025)

By William Pattison

 

This time I got oscar-winning director Guillermo del Toro’s adaptation of Mary Shelley's classic tale of Victor Frankenstein, a brilliant but egotistical scientist who brings a creature to life in a monstrous experiment that ultimately leads to the undoing of both the creator and his tragic creation.

I won’t go into too many spoilers. This film is not just a homage to Mary Shelly’s novel, but all earlier adaptions of the story. There are aspects of this film that even harken back to the Peter Cushing Baron Frankenstein films and even the Hallmark adaption and Branough’s Frankenstein as well.

 Oscar Issac’s Victor Frankenstein is clearly an ego case and is very much the true monster of the story. But since this is a Del Toro film the questionable actions of The Creature are forgiven and he comes off as a sensitive, misunderstood, victim of circumstance.

 I like the fact that William Frankenstein is an adult man. I never liked that he was a child in the book and other adaptions. I also liked that Del Toro expanded and made a complicated subplot with Elizabeth.

Then sets and production is fantastic. The Creature design is brilliant. There is an excellent balance of practical and CGI FX as well.

Though this adaptation is not my absolute favorite I can say it is in my top five. I applaud Guillermo for this incredible film. I just wish Netflix hadn’t cheated audiences the chance to fully experience this film the way Del Toro intended. I still highly recommend this film. It is very much a ride…

 

Conjuring the Inferno, aka Flesh for the Inferno (2015)

Conjuring the Inferno, aka Flesh for the Inferno (2015)

By William Pattison

 

A local community group volunteers to prepare a dilapidated Catholic school for a make-over, unbeknownst to them that a sulphurous curse stemming from the unjust and grievous punishment of a pious group of Sisters has condemned the place.

Well, I thought this was going to be a throwback to such classics as Gates of Hell, The Church, and The Beyond. Though it was obvious the filmmakers were inspired by those films this film is mired by the lack of characterization and character development that a lot of lower tier horror films suffer from. Though there are a couple of scenes that mirror these great Italion classics it suffers from the modern Hollywood lack of style and respect for the material.

This film rather than embracing the type of film it wanted to present instead made it cheap and common.

If you like a few gore scenes and flat characters this is your film. As for me as a cultured horror aficionado I cannot recommend this film. Honestly, I’ll forget it after fifteen minutes…ok gone…Yeah… What was I talking about???

Review: 3 Demons (2022)

Review :3 Demons (2022)

By William Pattison

 

Ok, this time we got an art house psychological demonic film from Uncorked Films.

3 DEMONS fixes on a Deputy that is tasked with watching over the body of a recently deceased woman until her family can arrive and claim her. As his curiosity gets the better of him, he inadvertently concludes an unfinished ritual. The conjuring now complete, strange and sinister forces begin to target him. As his past is unearthed, he's forced to face his own demons with terrifying consequences.

Uncorked is one of those distribution company that for the most part puts out total crap. Some of my worse film experiences have been watching Uncorked films. Once in a long while they manage to put out something entertaining. This is one of those rare films. It is all thanks to a fantastic performance by actor Peter Tell as the unfortunate Officer Fisher. Literally Fisher goes through hell as demons mentally torture him while he is watching over the body of a murder victim in a ritual circle. The character of Fisher is what holds this film together and it is Tell’s performance that is the glue. If he had just walk through his performance, like so many do in these films it would have been a mess, but Tell have it his all and this film is great because of it. I love films like this. I’m  happy and I’m  sure you will be too. I highly recommend this film, no alcohol required…

 

Review: Lechuza (2025)

Review: Lechuza (2025)

By William Pattison

This time we got an old fairy tale adapted for modern times…

On the way to a camping trip, a family tries to help an old lady lying in the middle of the road. She turns out to be a witch and casts the curse of the Lechuza upon them. Later that night, she transforms into a winged demon who terrorizes the family.

Nvr in a while I run into some micro budget horror films. These films are usually done on budgets between $10,000 to $100,000 and are shot in as little as four days. This films are shot with cheap cameras or even on occasion phones with more than likely the phone’s microphone as the only audio. The filmmakers of these film have to use a lot of imagination to tell their stories. Sometimes it works and sometimes not. They are never really great, but a small portion of these are watchable. This one is watchable. It takes the Hansel and Grettle trope and puts it in modern times and has the witch terrorizing a nice Latin family. The witch design is ok. It consists of  scary mask covered by a black veil. I wish they would have made up the witch’s arms and finger nails because it look obvious it was a younger woman . The hands were too soft and manicured to be a witch’s. It was way too Spirit Halloween bargain barrel to be taken seriously.

I recommend you watch this film after having a large amount of alcohol and a couple doobies for good measure. Then it will be a party…

 

Review: The Gates (2023)

Review: The Gates (2023)

By William Pattison

This time I got a WOKE period piece ghost story about the invention of the EVP recorder…

A serial killer has been sentenced to death by electric chair in London in the 1890s, but in his final hours, he puts a curse on the prison he is in, and all of those in it.

I found this to be an amazingly entertaining period ghost story even though it played with history to have a black guy as a high ranking member of the British Paranormal Society. Robert Brake is excellent as the satanic serial killer ghost though he is horribly under used in this film. That atmosphere in the prison where the story takes place is well done. There were scenes that were very reminisce of The Evil Dead, which is also a bonus, since this film could have been a very dry watch like a lot of British horror. It was also wonderful to see John Rhys-Davies as the post mortum photographer/inventor/paranormal investigator. Even with the WOKE issue I can highly recommend this film, no alcoholic beverages or wacky weed required…

 

B'twixt and Sunrise aka Twixt (2022)

B’twixt and Sunrise aka Twixt (2022)

By William Pattiso

I got a freaky one this time, a reedited ghost story by Francis Ford Coppola that stars Val Kilmer…

A writer with a declining career arrives in a small town as part of his book tour and gets caught up in a murder mystery involving a young girl. That night in a dream, he is approached by a mysterious young ghost named V. He's unsure of her connection to the murder in the town, but is grateful for the story being handed to him. Ultimately he is led to the truth of the story, surprised to find that the ending has more to do with his own life than he could ever have anticipated.

This film is an odd mix of art house noir, mystery, horror, and humor. I figure if Coppola hadn’t done Dracula before doing this film it wouldn’t  be as wonderful as it is. I never saw the butchered  2011 version but I can gather it lacked most of the subtext about the writer’s inner monologue, which is the actual heart of this narrative. In this version it comes clear who the killer was. I’m  sure the studio version was a mess that ended up losing money. It is no wonder why Coppla gave Frankenstein to Kenneth Branagh.

If you like freaky films like Pan’s Labyrenth you will find this film an interesting ride. I did.You can find this version of this film on You Tube.

Hellriser (2017)

Hellriser (2017)

By William Pattison

This time I got a supernatural detective story in the style of Cove Barker’s Harry De Amour..

When their city is rocked by a series of brutal occult murders, veteran detective John Locke and his young partner Terri Keyes are forced to put aside their differences and follow the trail of evidence to a formerly abandoned asylum, where the new owner Dr Unnseine is conducting his own brand of Nazi-inspired "medical research" on the unwilling inmates. One such inmate, the sexy but deadly Annie Dyer, may hold the key to the murders - and to the doorway to Hell itself - if only Locke and Keyes can stay alive long enough to discover what it is.

What if Clive Barker and Charlie Band worked on a horror film together?  I would think the results would be something like this film. After all  title of Hellriser you would think it would have a touch of Barker to it, or be a tacky Hellblazer rip off.

When I first saw this film among a the thumbnails on Tubi TV I was amused. I thought this film would be a joke. I was happily surprised how much I enjoyed this film. It is not a masterpiece, but the story does have a lot of aspects that remind me of Barker’s De Amour stories. Also, it has the comic book, low budget feel of the works of Charles Band, which is one of my favorites.

I was a bit disappointed that they made Detective Locke such an incompetent police officer. But, what I did like about Locke’s storyline was that he was a man who lost his faith because of what happened to his daughter. One of my favorite scenes with Locke was when he warned the prostitute and gave her his extra copy of The Bible. Though teamed up with Locke the young female detective worked out well I did not like the fact that the screenwriter made her the all intelligent woman working with the idiot older white guy. That actually annoyed me. In the story she did all the research and found all the clues while Locke waited for phone calls from the coroner and went out for an alcoholic lunch and checked out after finding each murdered girl.

Now in regard to the nutso doctor at the asylum/specialty clinic, he was the typical German mad scientist/ Nazi torturer. His “therapy” device looked like something out of an old 50s sci Fi movie or Marvel comics.

The atmosphere was very art noire and Z grade horror with heavy shadows and darkened background and heavy red and blue lighting added in. The FX were definite Z grade low budget, which is actually an asset in this case. Unfortunately, there is no demonic makeup. There is a lot of naked lady scenes.

All in all if you want a z grade popcorn paranormal mystery you will enjoy this film. You can currently find this film on Tubi TV…

Jessabelle (2014)

Review: Jessabelle (2014)

By William Pattison

This time I’m reviewing a ghost story that takes place in the Louisiana Bayou…

Returning to her childhood home in Louisiana to recuperate from a horrific car accident, Jessabelle comes face to face with a long-tormented spirit that has been seeking her return -- and has no intention of letting her escape.

Nothing better than a ghost story located in the Bayou and featuring voodoo. This film oozes atmosphere and the ghost is scary as shit. I love that they use old VHS tapes to reveal the backstory.

I love the design of the ghost. This ghost is oozing with swamp water and is vicious as hell.

The cast does their jobs well. The lead actress royally plays things up just right. And the girl who plays the ghost is frickin’ crazy. She has a near feral nastiness to her performance.

Like my favorite Bayou film The Skeleton Key, this film is a treat for ghost fans and voodoo fans. I highly recommend it…

 

Review:RL Stine's Pumpkinhead (2025)

R.L. Stine's Pumpkinhead (2025)

By William Pattison

 

I got you a young adult horror film that is promoted as being written by RL Stine…

Sam, his older brother Finn, and his mom move to a farm community. Sam is not at all happy about the move because there is nothing for him to do besides go the the harvest celebration at a creepy old man’s farm at the invitation of the sheriff. Sam to act out steals the farmer’s prize freaky pumpkin which he later finds out is part of a curse the farmer put on the community to get the community a good harvest each year. The cost is a child who becomes the pumpkin and is lost and forgotten at the strike of midnight on Halloween. When Finn finds out Sam stole the pumpkin he tried to give it back to the farmer, but he gets turned into the pumpkin. Everyone forgets Finn exists, except Sam. Now, Sam along with the sheriff’s daughter and a freaky guy who lives in the woods and knows about the curse must find a way to save Finn  and fight their way past the scarecrow who is the guardian of the curse for the clock strike midnight on Halloween night.

Now for one thing this film was clearly credited as being written by a writer other than RL Stine. Also, no where in the credits say it is an adaptation of a RL Stine story and this pisses me off. Give me a break. I expect when I see RL’s name on the film that it will at the very least an adaptation of an RL story or in the case of the two Goosebumps feature film have RL Stine characters and take place in RL’s world he has created. This film has none of that. Yes, this film has a bit of the style of the Goosebumps kids TV series, though it is far more violent and scary at times…Shit, they cut the scarecrow’s head off in one scene and kids actually die, which is a big no no in RL Goosebumps style stories. Also the ending is definitely notupper case something RL would do. The scarecrow design is far scarier than anything in a genuine RL Stine adaptation…Well other than the two season abortion of Goosebumps that came out recently.

Honestly, I think modern teenagers would find this film way too prudish for their tastes. Give me a break most kids now a days start out in horror watching A Nightmare on Elm Street and Friday the 13^th. So, this film will not thrill original Goosebumps fans nor young horror fans. Shoot it is as bad as that horrid Spirit Halloween movie that came out a couple years ago. So, as you can gather I wasn’t  thrilled with this film and I refuse to recommend a fraudulent RL Stine film, even though I know RL is getting paid for the use of his name. Sorry, RL, I’m  not supporting you being lazy…

 

 

Review: Dead & Buried (1981)

Review: Dead & Buried (1981)

By William Pattison

 

Sheriff Dan Gillis has a nice life with his wife, the teacher Janet Gillis, in the small coastal and friendly town of Potter's Bluff. When visitors are mysteriously killed in the town, Sheriff Gillis investigates the cases carefully and finds that dead people are reanimating and coming back to life. Dan finds a book of witchcraft and voodoo in his wife's drawer and he suspects that she might be practicing black magic. Dan meets the coroner-mortician William G. Dobbs and learns the dreadful and surprising secret.

Unfortunately, this film was a complete flop in theaters at the time. It was actually six years after the films release that I actually saw it on video. At the time my opinion on this was so so, but over the years I’ve  actually started to like this film. I can say the FX stand up really well. The one scene where the town coroner reconstructs the woman’s face is amazing.

This film is actually one of those rare jewels of horror cinema. It was made in a time of great transition of horror between the more cerebral, psychological, horror and the gore filled slasher era. Also this is not your common zombie film, though it’s  been catalogued as a zombie film. This film is unique and is something to be seen if you like late 70s early 80s horror that goes it’s own way I think you will be surprised by this film…

 

 

The Black String (2018)

Review: The Black String (2018)

By William Pattison

 

Jonathan is a lonely twenty-something, stuck in his home town working night shifts at the local convenience store. When an unexpected encounter with a mysterious woman turns his life upside down, Jonathan is stricken by illness and nightmarish visions. Paranoid and desperate, he launches on a quest across the suburbs to find the seductress who started it all. Friends and family believe he's losing his mind, but Jonathan is convinced he's the target of something far more sinister.

This is a weird film and it is made to be that way. I love it for this. You can either take the route where Jonathon is having a full on paranormal experience or you can go the route where he is having delusions. It is up to the viewer to choose. The filmmaker has done this brilliantly.

The actor playing Johnathan is the glue that holds this film together. It is his performance that adds credence to all the freaky stuff happening.

This is a highly psychological film that makes the viewer think about what they are seeing. Thus, this is not a film for every horror fan. If you are looking for lots of Gore and jump scares this is not the film for you. This film is a frightening game of perception. It is a film I will happily recommend is you are a fan of psychological horror…

 

Devon (2024)

Review: Devon (2024)

By William Pattison

This time I got the Pluto TV exclusive found footage film directed by the former reality TV From Jersey Shore star Jenni Farley who was once known as JWwow.

A group of volunteers who answer an ad on cryptic website on the internet go to a shut down asylum to investigate a missing girl named of Devon, who disappeared at the asylum twenty years earlier. But they find that there is more to this place than just it being creepy. Something fatal and possibly paranormal. Paranoia and insanity runs rampant, voices are heard, the screaming starts, and people start disappearing.

To start out I have to say I’m  impressed with this film. I have watched hundreds of found footage films and I have to say that this film is in my top ten. I could tell that Jenni Farley put a ton of love into this film.

Some people think that doing a found footage film is cheap and amateur time. This film was made on a modest budget, it in no way is this film in any way amateurish. Farley uses the darkness of Pentherst Asylum to its advantage. She uses flashlights tactically to show the viewer just what she wants them to see. The effect is horrifyingly claustrophobic. Also she uses sound in unision with the lack of light to add to the terror. In this film the jump scares are purely sound driven with no music.

Also unlike the majority of found footage film you are never bored because there is always something happening. Farley doesn’t waste time she is constantly hitting both the characters and audience on a psychological level.

The acting and characterization is top notch. The actress that steals the show is Rotisha Geter who plays potential psychology professor Alison Roberts. Rotisha’s shows Alison’s journey into paranoia and insanity in a stark and brutal way. You can tell that her performance forced the other members of the cast to up their game.

This film is plain brilliant. It reminds me of the low budget love project over a decade ago by a young director named James Wan, whose first film, SAW, started the torture porn subgenre of horror. Unfortunately,  when Wan started getting big budgets and more mainstream films he lost a lot of that incredible brilliance he has with that first film. I hope that if she can Jenni Farley might be able to retain some of the incredible brilliance I saw her achieve with Devon, but I fear this is a pipedream. The lure of a bigger budget and more toys is way too seductive for a young filmmaker. But for now we have Devon and it is AWESOMETACULAR!!! You can find this film exclusively on Pluto TV for free in its Halloween Hits List. I highly recommend you check this film out while it’s available…

Review: No Tears in Hell (2025)

Review: No Tears in Hell (2025)

By William Pattison

 

This time I got a serial killer tale that is supposedly based on a true case…

In Alaska's winter darkness, a mother and son transform their home into a house of horrors, drawing homeless people in for abuse, murder, and cannibalism.

This a nastily realistic portrayal of a serial killer. It is brutal yet the gore is not overdone. There is a sadistic honesty about the killings. The portrayals of Alex and his mother both spot on without become a parody. You can see that both of them lack a moral compass. In fact Alex seems to take pride in his work and compares it to Bundy and Dahmer.

If you are not a hardcore slasher fan I  wouldn’t recommend this film to you. But if you are a fan of true crime and find realistic serial killers interesting then you will find this film interesting. In my case I felt a bit dirty watching this film.

Review: Incident at Loch Ness (2004)

Review: Incident at Loch Ness (2004)

By William Pattison

 

This time I got a film by the eccentric filmmaker Werner Hertzog…

This is a mockumentary within a mockumentary. The ensemble cast is a Who's Who of modern filmmaking, from Werner Herzog, independent director (Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979), Grizzly Man (2005), Rescue Dawn (2006)) playing himself directing a documentary, to cinematographer Gabriel Beristain (of the Blade movies) playing himself, to Sound Recorder/Mixer extraordinaire Russell Williams II (of Independent Lens (1999), Moesha (1996), Training Day (2001)) playing himself, to.. well you get the idea. Throw in the legend of Nessie and you've got a totally hilarious thriller mockumentary directed by Zak Penn.

This is an interesting film that crosses the line between precieved reality and fiction. It successfully tricks you into thinking that you are watching a behind the scenes video of a tacky made Nessie documentary. What I really found amusing is Herzog got well know members of the film industry to enhance this fiction.

Of course once the monster gets involved all hell breaks loose and you are literally sitting and shaking your head at the complete absurdity of the situation. It was actually entertaining in that Oh, no you didn’t way.

So with this said, and yes I’m  not talking about the camera work, acting, or FX. This is one movie that all this doesn’t  matter. This is Werner Herzog being nuts and it is a blast. This is the guy who did a movie about a group of guys moving a boat across the Amazon to get to the river on the other side. This guy is wacko and he is doing a fako movie about him pissing off The Loch Ness Monster and getting members of his crew killed in the process…Fucking right I’m  going to recommend it. Have a party. Get messed up and enjoy… You can find it exclusively on Pluto TV in the On Demand Halloween Hits. Fuck man, you can’t  find it on DVD or anywhere else…